[The friendship equivalent of running off with a younger woman] In the five years we spent together in New York, we lived in three apartments and had a rotating cast of at least 15 additional roommates.
Our lives were often uncertain, filled with last minute bookings, auditions and rehearsals. We braved blizzards and survived a heat wave by freezing towels instead of paying for air-conditioning.
Then, about a year and a half ago, my long-term boyfriend and I broke up.
For the first time since we had known each other, Russell and I were single at the same time.
But as two young single people who eventually wanted to be in romantic partnerships, our relationship didn’t leave much time or space for new people to come into our lives.
Last year, one of Russell’s best friends was moving to our neighborhood at the same time that my sister (my original roommate! Ultimately, we decided that Russell and his friend would move to a nearby apartment with our cat, and my sister would move into our apartment with me.
We went on vacations together, became writing partners and even adopted a cat together.
Most of the time we lived together, I had a boyfriend and Russell casually dated people, so there was never a reason to examine our relationship to see if it could be more than platonic.
Over the next few months, as I was adjusting to being single, Russell became my person.
He would text to make sure I got home safely; we would go to events together; we even visited each other’s home towns.
Russell and I told this story the way we tell many stories, finishing each other sentences and laughing the whole way through.
Someone who didn’t know either of us well asked how long we had been dating.
Dear nairalanders please I need your advice on this.